I am back from The Trip. I survived! Actually, both of us did. And while on this trip, I took the opportunity to write up this little pop quiz to give you an idea of how it went.

Q: You are a flight attendant. It is time to serve meals to the cabin. There is a mother and her one year old son sitting by the bulkhead. The baby is asleep. Do you:

1. Serve the mother first, better feed her while the baby is asleep.
2. Serve everyone else in the cabin first. Wait until the baby wakes up to serve the mother.

Q: You are that same flight attendant. The baby is now awake and fussing, and the mother was served the meal 40 minutes ago. She is contorted into an unnatural position, leaning over her son playing with him. Do you:

1. Take away her tray, she looks busy and would probably appreciate not being blocked from holding her son to keep him happy.
2. Leave her tray - it looks like she's not done yet, and she probably has the time and inclination to eat more.

Q: You are a flight attendant. There is a baby in a carseat, sleeping soundly. He has a pacifier resting on his chest. Do you:

1. Smile at his adorable face and move on, you have other things to do.
2. Pick up the pacifier and try to put it in his mouth, he probably needs the pacifier now.

OK, now add up your points. For every time you answered “2”, give yourself 0 points. For every time you answered “1”, give yourself a googol of points. Scores:

0: You have apparently never been on a plane with a screaming baby and thus have never come to the conclusion that you do whatever you need to to make the baby happy, ignoring the businessman across the way if need be regardless of how much he paid, because if the baby's not happy, nobody is happy.

1 or more points: Congratulations! You're not an idiot.