Google plays nice and It's all fun and games until someone pokes out an I

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Microsoft without an I is just Mcrosoft. Inoun without an I is just a noun. Which is what I am.

So I have an answer to all of the silly silliness of Google "cheating" and "Bing stealing" lately. Every time they don't play nice in the sandbox with each other, we start removing vowels or consonants from all of the search results. The thought is this. If companies can steal, cheat, lie and "own" search results, and force others to remove results, etc. maybe they can own words and letters too. I mean seriously, how far will this kind of thinking go?

So we have to set up some rules to make this game work. But before I do, let me be clear. I am a Microsoft employee. Microsoft is the only company I work for. But they also have never told me or even hinted at what I can and can not write. Which means, because I am an engineer, I tend to write quite bluntly. But I never have any ill intent. Really. I may call companies diputs. But it is only because that is such a funny word and I may use the word parc, because that is funny too (and because we don't want to encourage little children to say mean things about other people or companies, as the case may be.) Remember. The purpose of this blog is to show how word associations make or break search. How people think. How search works with the associations that we make in our heads about words and phrases. Over the months, we have played a ton o games here. But as an adult, I also realize that games are fun only until someone pokes out an I. So in this case,

  • Microsoft will own the vowels
  • Google owns all of the consonants. For those of you who failed english, that's basically everything else.
  • We parse through the search results, and every time one of the vendors slams on the other, we take away one of their letters.

I only do this because there are fewer vowels in the English alphabet, and just like Microsoft has fewer search users, so should Microsoft have fewer letters to lose. So today, over lunch, I attempted to write this blog by parsing out and removing letters as "bad" "unfair" results are found. And let's see where this takes us. So here goes.

I read recently that Google is upset about Microsoft "stealing" some search results. There you go, O's taken away from Micrsft. T bad s srry. Yu are nt allwed t play any mre in the search business with 's.

Then I read that Micrsft accused Ggle f being hypcritical abut privacy because capturing clicks is smething they d as well. ne strike against yu Ggle. N mre l's fr yu Gge.

Then I read abut Gge accusing Micrsft abut their Vista search bxes. ne strike fr yu Micrsft. N mre e's fr yu.

I as saw a wb pag abut Gg capturing wirss infrmatin. N mr g's fr yu.

And th yu hav it. Nw it is amst impssib t vn t any wrk dn.

If this kps up, I am sn in t b ut f wrk.

whch mans prtty sn I' b t f a jb.

n mr wrk fr yu Inun