[ed. For those of you a little confused, this article attempts to take a funny story and then turn it into a high ranking search result like: http://www.bing.com/search?q=sharepoint+rest+assured and thereby making it funny as well.  In the end, Rest assured, C# with SharePoint search is the way to go.]

I live with a bunch of crazy people.  Not really, but some would think so based on the kinds of things they talk about.

When the teenage boys aren't talking about the size of their waist (that's misspelled by the way), they have random discussions at my house about REST, C, irascible and phalanges.

Are you cereal?

Yes very much so.  Buy now, you should no that I am a very down to dirt kind of guy.  But sometimes, even I can't believe how the conversations at the Inoun home and how'ss go.  The following stories are all true, accept were they are not....   And that is only to protect the not so innocent.

REST

We were talking about REST at the rest home Inoun home the other day.  Yes, the programming model that is all the rage ragged array reggae right code write now rage.  But to be Frank and Shirley you can't be serious, REST has always mint something different to me.  BID (I will get to that in a minute.  What rest really means to me....)  Anyway, around the Inoun home the other day, we were having a very detailed and intricate discussion about REST and REST like interfaces, i.e. talking about REST, JSON, C#, AJAX, Javascript, and other programming methodologies, when my youngest son pipes in and says, "C is useless".

Really?  "Yeah, C is useless."  Well, this I had to know more about.  Understand the context here.  He knew exactly what we were talking about, yes, even at 12, he knows a bit about programming and such, but something in the conversation sparked his "Inoun association button" and he decided to midup the conversation stream (I just coined that new euphemism by the way.  It's when someone interrupts the current conversation mid-stream to bring up something completely out of context and throw it into the conversation.  As in, a best friend when they interrupt a conversation mid-stream and say something completely pointless...  You might say, "nice midup bozo dude..."  Sometimes it is also used in writing as a midstream thought interruption like this one.)  Nice midup Inoun.

So, he midup's the conversation and claims that C is useless.  I stopped, looked at him, and waited.  After a second, he realizes that he is now in center stage and says, "no really, the other day my friends and I were talking about this.  We were all debating which letter in the alphabet is the most useless."  To which my first thought was, really?  I can't believe my son's friends don't know anything about programming?   Well, no not really, apparently, they had all given this letter thing quite a bit of thought.  Impressive.  I think they were playing chess or solving world hunger at the time (see even chess can destroy young minds almost as good world piece oar an engwish, I knew I new how to spell, engwish teacher).  After a long intro then, in the end, I was really surprised by the amount of effort they went through to figure out which letter of the alphabet was the most useless.

And, from their perspective, C it was.  But being the father I am, I challenged him to a verbal, letter dual.  I retorted, "but C is for cookie!  You wouldn't want to take that away from the poor education starved children now would you?"  To which and for-twit, he responded, "Dad, that doesn't even make any sense.  That should be a K.  As in K is for kookie."  I could tell, he wasn't going to go down easy.  To which I said, "what about the sea shells I see by the seashore?"  He responds with discussed.  :-)  "Dad, in case you hadn't noticed, there isn't even a C in there.  See what I mean.  C is useless!"  This went on for another 15 minutes ore so, and we finally got distracted by a re-Pete of a discussion my dad you'sd to have around how Engwish was herd to learn.  You see, to him english wasn't his first, second, third or even fourth or fifth language.  I think it was seventh.  And he ought to know how hard inglish is.  He's well into his almost 90's now, and at about 83 he learned Spanish in about a month.  Fur sure.  True story.  I think that Spanish was number 9 or 10.  I am not sure.  But that's another story for another day.  BID.

English is hard.  No way around it.  And it is because of, come on now, everyone with me now.  Marketing.

So the outcome?  How did the dual, dawhl, dawdle, dowel, deal, dull, Dule, Dahle, dewell, DWL, Dewalt, dool, Dahl, deal, Dwal, Dali, Dalai, dell, Dahlia, delilah, Duwel, dill, Deil, Delia, Diehl, dawn, Dawn, down, (I could go on for a long time...), duel end?  Yup, you guessed it.  C is pretty much useless.  Like marketing, lawyers and bean counters, they, it pretty much takes its value from producers somewhere else.  They don't actually create or make anything by themselves.  They just sound like someone else.  Renters.  Yes, renters of value.  C is just like that, and yes, I am still talking about the letter C not other leeches on society.  Just the letter C.  Often confused with S or K.  As in Caesar or queasy.

Anyway.  As a father, it is something that I do freely.  Help the kids (no, not as in goats), to become better, smarter, and more edumacated in there o so far out their language of english rules and participles of Christmas presents past.  I do it, because, if I didn't not do it done Dudley diddle doo right, then well, the english teachers mite.

And we can't have that now kan wee?

REST assured, I Inoun will get to the bottom of it.  In the end, I will get to the bottom.  Get it?  Bottom?  Oh...

*sigh*  I haven't told you that won yet.  An Inown example....

Well, since a lot of my work uses REST technologies with a bit of SharePoint, Search, FAST, C, Powershell and C# thrown in for good measure and snakes, lawyers, and other technologies like Python thrown in, low and behold, imagine to my surprise when, while working with a customer on sight, I needed to use their powder room, ah, I mean men's REST room, and right before me, out of the blew, there on the wall, is a package of paper.  Some wizmo gizmo something or others you put on your seat if you know what I mean, hanging on the wall titled, "Rest Assured".  Well, while sitting there, contemplating the meaning of life, liberty, happiness and my waist size, I had a funny thought.  We were struggling with security issues around some REST interfaces, and it occurred to me that what we really needed was a name for all those REST security products that were not letting me rest at night, or anywhere else.  And then the light bulb came on.  REST assured.  It really did.  And for anyone that didn't, we could hang little paper thingies around the necks if they didn't do REST right.  And we'd be rest assured that it would all work correctly.  REST assured, I was going to get to the bottom of it.  If you know what I mean.  Get it?  Got it?  Good.

Then I dropped it.  The idea.  Not the paper, REST security or anything else.  Well, kind of, the paper did its job and everything else?  Well, let's just say it all came out all right.

In the end.

The end.