I had Chinese food for lunch. This was my fortune:
You will receive an unexpected gift.
If I do indeed receive a gift, won't it now be expected?
You should finish every fortune you read with "on a toilet".
or, "in bed"
No. Because you will actually receive two gifts. The first one will seem to fulfill the fortune, so you won't be expecting the second one. Then all of a sudden, whamo, there it is all unexpected like.
Of course, two parking tickets in the same day sort of sucks.
Maybe you'll get Schrödinger's Cat?